Respect and Reform
I listened to the speech given by the so-called Queen Elizabeth II this morning, and I've got to say I was disappointed. The theme of "Respect and Reform" was not carried through sufficiently, resulting in proposed legislation which is far too liberal for the world we live in today. Here are my proposals:
- Given the ongoing threat of terrorism, all citizens shall be required to perform 1 hour of archery practice every day and to ensure that they carry their longbow at all times.
- Any meeting of three of more women will be deemed to be a "coven" and hence be committing the offence of "engaging in the planning or preparation of an act of terrorism".
- Not only will youths be banned from wearing hoods, they will have to wear school uniform at all times, address all adults as sir/madam, and be referred to as "little wee men."
- No individual will be permitted to have a creative thought without the written permission of the prime minister.
- Continued reform of the NHS bureaucracy will result in conventional anesthetic being replaced by buckets of boiling pitch. MRSA will also be prevented in this way.
10 Comments:
Double, double, toil and trouble.
Fire burn and cauldron ... >coff< !splutter?
Thou hast us infected by a bug superlative, with resistance to magick laden! Damn thee, Lady.
We wonder if all of those pauses in King Blair's speech are because he's struggling to adhere to the iambic pentameter?
Oi! Back to work you three.
No way, Hecate. Everybody knows that your bit wasn't written by Billy S at all. It rhymed, for heaven's sake!
Besides. We're all too sick to work. Even our familiars (Greymalkin et al) have a wee sniffle.
By the way, is that an antibiotic-resistant wart on your upper lip? If you'd realised in time then the tories could have used you to demonstrate how dirty King Blair has allowed the infirmaries to become.
Right! We three are off to seek asylum on a blasted heath. Laters.
Hey Colonel, does that mean you like sweaty matrons? I'll fill my bucket with anything you like.
>wink<
I might not have been written by Shakin' Bill but all audiences love my octosyllabic couplets, so I'm still queen.
You gels can brew up some calpol potion and get on with your enchanting.
Right, Hecate! Think you can trample over the workers? These women are ill, and I daresay their sickness hasn't been helped by you trying to get them to brew up a new faster strain of speed for you to sell to those happy-slapping antisocial types.
You'll be hearing from our warlocks.
Of course it's antibioitic resistant, warts are caused by viruses.
id est viri
But you said just the opposite in your first post. Ach, me heed.
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