Sleeping Beauty.

Thanks to my new diet of deep-fried haggis and tea I'm feeling a lot better now. If only we'd had such innovations in the tenth century - people would have have had so much trouble moving they wouldn't have been able to start wars over dynastic succession.

I do hope that the new pontiff settles in and creates some decent Dr. Who villains. Young kids walking around with gas-masks on saying "Where's my mummy?" just don't do it for me. They could at least have given him a plunger for an arm.

Although it's technically a holiday, the colonel has chosen to come into the office to sleep. Any suggestions as to how I should wake him up?